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Ctrl – Alt -Del : The Revolutionary Soft Boot

I sit evening after evening, often in bed early, propped up comfortably gazing at my spectacular tranquil view

What a difference a year can make.

I want to share with you what I have been brewing for the last few days

And in all honesty, it’s the perfect NY thing.

I am a pattern girl

A virgo for sure

And a love for language, numbers and order

haunt me often.

However I have a quirky side where the patterns and numbers get to play

They have supported me in exams, essays, probabilities and business for years

Yes I have a knack for poker

It used to pay for my school lunches

Yet thats entirely another blog.

I have always loved the soothing voices of reason in my head

And the quirky way I question my own decision making

Provides a running commentary that is a comedy sketch that often requires censorship…

However my favorite of all ‘WTF commentary’ is

Don’t forget Ctrl – Alt – Del.

It revolutionised IT

And you would be hard pressed to find anyone who hasn’t blessed that 3 key prayer as it rebooted everything

It’s THE analogy on so many levels.

First thing is that you co-ordinate your hands and press keys.

To do that you have to LET GO of what isn’t working.

You avoid fidgetting and fumbling with dusty cords if you were really unlucky, or at best working out which is the right power button.

SOoooo

Control.

What can you control – exactly ?

Deal with that.

Or consider that instead of trying to get something to work that refuses….just take control with 1 key.

Alt.

Pick an alternate.

Is there one ?

STOP and consider whether the one you are dealing with is EVER going to be a combination that works.

Del.

My personal favorite.

Because it KICKS my PROCRASTINATION in the BUTT.

DELETE that MOFO.

Gone.

Cant get it back.

At least its a decision.

So whats been my Ctrl-Alt-Del Soft boot ?

I have Unsubscribed, Unfollowed, Deleted so much stuff.

Social Media connected mainly tbh.

I want to enjoy my Social Media again.

I archived a few of my pages.

I then went back and deleted them.

People will do the same with mine – and I prefer that.

I cant be fussed worrying about whether someone thinks it’s about them, or gets offended.

Thats their stuff and most people will go through rollercoasters of anxiousness, grief, anger and everything in between.

Just like I do.

I just don’t want to see it.

I haven’t the inclination or energy for it – I just don’t.

So what do I mean by that ?

I just want to enjoy my social media and connect with those who enjoy what I share.

I have so loved New Year greetings from so many far and wide.

My circle is large, global, and I am truly blessed.

Yet my inner circle is small.

Though many are welcomed, as many are not.

And thats absolutely fine.

My space is mine to do with what I feel works for me.

Importantly, things change for all of us along the way.

And just like Del. There is always a way to return if the door is meant to be opened.

I pocket dialed someone I used to spend so much time with.

Random. Bizarre.

That made it random connecting twice in as many months, where there had been none for maybe 5 or so years.

The door wont likely open again – yet the encounters were respectful.

And why wouldn’t they be ?

So soft boot and take control of as much as you can – or as much as you can handle.

Stop and consider alternatives.

And clear out what doesn’t serve you.

Revolutionary on so many levels.

xx

Enjoy

good person

 

Opportunities or obstacles

I get it

Positivity and plans, ideas and concepts

We all have them

I don’t know about you however I seriously hold my breath some (most) days and hope, pray, sweet talk and motivate myself – yes – all in the one breath.

And thats before the day even begins.

I have had quarter of a century being in the thick of big business decisions, crisis management, and strategising at high level.

I have had family circumstances that would shut down many peoples universe.

I lost a husband who passed at 57, and have had to manage myself and my children’s grief through the minefield of disgraceful behaviour from people who knew better and should be ashamed of themselves.

Yet I am here, upright, and breathing.

(With a smile on my dial I might add)

Yet all those things mean I have succeeded, I can strategise, yet what they do NOT do is GUARANTEE anything.

Not one thing.

What it means is that I may have more confidence that I will come out the other side of what life throws at me…

Yet that is only half the battle.

I don’t doubt for one second that even the most accomplished of entrepreneurs in all of their endeavours, have the same hold your breath moments.

What we – you – I – they – ALL have in common, is the HUMAN element.

You see what makes us individuals, makes us similar.

It is the humanity within us, the empath, the questioner, the confident, the brave, the shy and the clueless.

We each have our moments in each experience, where we take that breath and consider.

We consider who we are, what this might mean, to us and to others.

It hardens us, makes us warm and squishy, engages and entertains us.

You each get to choose that part.

Your crazy moment is not so crazy after all you see.

It’s the gift – yet feels so intense sometimes that we don’t do anything with it beyond trying to survive it.

As many of my mentorship students will attest, and almost anyone who has ever attended a workshop with me for that matter will recall the realisation,  that we instantly go on the defensive when theres a surge of energy from within us.

We hold our breath and notice the moment.

Instantly we see it as something affecting us. And our first choice is defensive.

We miss that moment to recognise the varying degrees of experience, and the potential for opportunities that lay within it

And that is what I wish for you.

I wish that tomorrow morning, before your day truly begins,

when you take that ‘here we go’ breath to start your day

That you see the opportunity in the midst of everything that wells up from within you

I wish for you to see how incredible you are

I wish you joy

and I wish for you the best of yourself.

You deserve better

You deserve the best of you and what life can bring.

And I encourage you to embrace it.

And know that when you do

Another person will be watching and will embrace the fire within them

Be your best self

For you.

For others.

For you.

xx

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Nearly Nearly isn’t good practice

At this time of year, people – well I can only speak for myself…

I ask myself what Do I want to keep doing – and why.

I want to continue things because I enjoy them

Or do I do things because I am contracted to do them for example

They are not the same thing at all.

So if you think about it

Why cant they be the same?

Because there is usually a timeframe around the latter.

Potentially a responsibility not a ‘liking’ for the connection.

So if you decide that you don’t want to continue doing something

Then find out the constraints

And decide if there is an option you hadn’t thought of

And mark out the time frame.

Then ask yourself how can I make the most of the time I have to flush away while I am stuck.

If you have to then you have to

Nobody says you cant make the best of it because you don’t like it.

And the difference here is mindset.

Mindset will give you perspective

And mindset will help you strategise

Remaining positive in a roomful of naysayers isn’t easy

Yet its always doable

If you remember that you are the only one in control of your mindset.

Others trying to stomp on it cant get in – they can only impress their mindset on you.

So what do you want to keep doing?

Do that as much as you can.

Not Nearly Nearly….

Do that bit wholeheartedly.

You deserve to choose at least that for yourself.

What don’t you want to continue?

Stop.

Or at the very least modify – even if its your viewpoint towards it

Hopefully you can ditch that which no longer serves you

And with it, the people who don’t either

Be strong

Be amazing

Be in your happy bubble

Be.

There is such incredible strength within you.

xx

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Celebrate and enjoy…

So Xmas day is over

Whether you managed, fought, avoided or smashed it

Its over for another year

I had the coolest calmest Xmas day with those closest

I certainly missed loved ones don’t get me wrong, however having cooked xmas lunch and xmas dinner for over 25 years, the last half a dozen have been pleasingly simpler.

The last year has been quite surreal. And thats absolutely OK.

Its been a rollercoaster for the last few weeks though – I wont deny it

However my goodness the heartfelt private messages that have been rolling in over the last week have been nothing short of amazing and they have certainly helped me through

I Celebrate and enjoy

The chapter that closes was full of experiences that doth fill quite a novel..

And I certainly wish you the ability to Celebrate and enjoy regardless of your day, your year, your company, or lack of

2019 will be amazing no matter what it brings

xx

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They will all be with you in your grief….I promise

There is something about what we have always called the high holidays or those main celebratory times

and Christmas is one of those days

where we cant help but notice the absence of loved ones.

Whether it’s the first Christmas without them, or the 15th, we miss them just as much.

We just get better at coping with the hole they have left

And the memories become loving memories where you smile as you remember

Rather then those where you feel gripped in that memory worrying you might forget

Its an in between state

Thats the only way to explain it.

I know because I am there

And anyone who has been where I am will understand – yet explain it in their own way

(And that is probably the thing to remember)

Its our moments

The grief comes in waves

And however and whatever it is for you

It will get better – I know it will.

But it will happen to you in your way.

It will stop you in a moment when you least expect it or you will know the early signs.

It’s coming.

And you hold your breath instead of breathing through it.

So how do I know about that part ?

Because I have been blessed to have spent decades as a medium and I have seen it through the eyes of loved ones who have passed

And I have seen how deeply it runs

And how overwhelming it can be.

And because of that – I know I will survive it

And so will you.

Your first, your 5th, and your 45th.

What I DO know is the reason we feel those moments so deeply is because they ARE close

Thats why the moments are so real and so raw.

Because they are there. With you.  In your grief.

Those moments becomes loving memories with Joy and appreciation instead of missing moments.

You will forget bits and pieces. Awful as it sounds.

Life will go on.

But you wont forget THEM. And neither will they forget you.

You will recall whats important. I promise you that too.

Many times the most heartwrenching thing is that we don’t feel them close in a way we wish we did.

The way it is explained to me is that they stand back to allow us to learn to live without them – because we have to.

Then slowly they come closer

We have deeper and clearer memories.

Those moments that take our breath away because they are so real.

Yet not so much when we are raw.

They are with us

I promise.

And I know it will get easier.

Because it just has to.

xx

diamond heart

 

What are you waiting for….exactly?

Theres just so many things in life we want.

We are seriously spoiled for choice aren’t we?

Now they say a watched pot never boils.

And having stood beside a kettle on the hob, thats just how it feels.

However some things we have to wait for, and some we just don’t.

It does though, depend on your perspective.

Perspective of what you might ask…

Well its about what you perceive as important.

Oh if it was only that simple….

If its important it’s worth the wait.

If it’s not – why are you waiting- what are you waiting for ?

Waiting to lick the beaters of cake batter as a kid

Important or not important ?

Not important to whom?

Try telling that to the kid in us who knows cleaning our room and doing homework is important yet not nearly as enticing as those beaters!

Now it’s almost forbidden because apparently theres raw egg and the like which is harmful.

I suggest it’s the chemical cocktail in the environment that is the culprit- yet thats a whole other blogpost….

So here you see my candy thermometer waiting for my sensational calendula mix ointment to come to the perfect temperature range so that when I decant it, theres none of those pit holes in the centre.

Oh I hated waiting. Yet it’s important for quality purposes.

Sure I will use it on the animals and likely they will not worry about the quality as much as I

Yet in my eyes its important.

It’s also the tactile side I enjoy about all this making. So the end result is about what I see as important

A bit of waiting wont kill me. She says…. (insert eye roll here)

Ask yourself whats important to you.

If so what are you waiting for – and why.

And for whom possibly.

What is important to you that you aren’t doing – right now?

Insert answer below!

___________________________________________________________________________

And if not – then why not?

It’s OK if it’s not doable for good reason – however is there SOMETHING you can do towards it?

Just something?

I can’t tell you how good it feels to do even a small thing towards something important to you if you aren’t doing it already.

Sometimes we hold back till we are ready. And I get that.

Thats somewhat how we are built.

However if you can, change things up just a little and do ONE thing, no matter how small, towards whats important to you.

You will feel fabulous

I guarantee a spark will ignite

And you never know…you might end up doing far more than you realise

Manifestation begins with you taking that small step.

Start

Do

Enjoy

Live your dreams xx

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The truth about the Karma Bus

There are so many ways that bus seems to run us over right ?

Its a bit of a weapon really

More of mass confusion in my opinion, and here is why….

We try – well as least I try – not to wish ill on others.

Have done in the past I can honestly admit.

Now my strategy is far less taxing energetically.

I figure the universal laws will sort that out

“Nie mój cyrk, nie moje małpy”

But how do we justify the hurt and unfortunate circumstances that befall so many who no matter how many ways we look at them, don’t deserve what has been dished out to them

We all know people like that

And to be honest, you are probably people like that too.

Life can really dish it out cant it?

Heavens above…

Growing up we try and work out what we did to deserve stuff

As we mature we start to reconcile the things that we got caught up in and potentially weren’t personal no matter how personally we may have been affected.

Doesnt mean the experience was any better – just that it wasn’t our fault or – here it is – our KARMA.

I like this article about Karma which loses me a little in the middle, but its light and ends making sense

This one is deeper and really sorts out a bit of rubbish which I LOVE – so NO, we don’t balance it like a bank account.

Remember the ’emotional bank account’ we all aspired to balance in the 90’s…

And it’s really a way to consider your moral compass.

What feels like the right thing to do even is shocking situations. Do that. Trust in your judgement.

So getting real for a second.

I can not tell you how heartbreaking it is to watch a strong, vibrant man succumb to aggressive cancer at 57.

Thats a raw deal in anyones language.

I am sure he would be the first to tell you he was quite the shit at times in his life, yet wow there is no way to explain that as a balancing act.

And what of everyone else who lost him ?

The truth about Karma is we use it as an explanation, a weapon, an excuse.

We might assume we are paying for something we did in another lifetime or want to ensure we don’t have to pay for later.

That sort of thinking can waste so much time.

And heres why I think that.

Our moral, ethical, emotional and soul centred compass knows right from wrong.

We should trust and choose and should stop worrying so much about paying back and paying forward.

Karma is really about energy. Not agenda.

What we get in this lifetime we may or may not pay for, or gain from in another.

What about now ?

Choose well now. Deal with whats in front of you and don’t let a ‘concept’ steal your moments.

Help others if you can and acknowledge the now.

Make your best decision and acknowledge when you were less than.

Make up because it’s right, not because you want nirvana later.

By its very nature, you will likely get Nirvana later for being good.

Be a good human now.

Be grateful for what you have and who you are even if you cant see the value in yourself like we all do

Be Kind. Now.

To yourself too

Be a kind human now.

In every moment.

I mean think about it….how that would play out if thats everyones every moment.

Now I am not daft and know thats not how everyone will behave.

Yet if we centre in on ourselves, the steps forward and moments we can control, then we should be getting Karma credits anyway so our bets are hedged.

You aren’t everyone else but you are an important part of ‘everyone’.

So let’s start with each of us…. and trust that the rest will flow

xx

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The key to Happiness

If you are expecting from others

You are doing yourself a disservice

If you expect people to thank you for your encouragement and support

It’s not the way to be

There is so much potential for disappointment

Yet that bit is on you.

Let me explain why.

Happiness isn’t going to come from outside sources

Experiences and things that make you happy certainly can come from outside sources

Yet you EXUDE happiness

Just like you experience from others

We all know what it feels like to be around happy people, happy social settings, happy workplaces

It’s a wonderful thing

It has the result of bringing out something in you

Which means it comes from within you.

So this post isn’t about how unfair things are

It’s not about how people aren’t appreciative

If you think that you will miss the point entirely.

It’s NOT about other people first and what they do and don’t do for you

At least it shouldn’t be.

Don’t get me wrong, how nice is it to feel appreciated!

To have another acknowledge your work and your worth

That is because they make the effort to share with you what they have felt BECAUSE of you and your efforts

And it doesn’t necessarily mean it was a BIG thing.

A kind thought

A word of encouragement

We all know how nice that feels

One of the kindest things you can do for others is to have no expectations

One of the most empowering things you can do for yourself is to have no expectations of others

One of the byproducts of that is being centred, and focused on yourself

What will kick in is your own inner strength

You will encourage and congratulate yourself more

Happiness is an inside job

Your happiness is inside you

Co-create with all parts of you – Heart, mind, body, soul, spirit.

You are responsible for your own happiness and Joy

And you are more than capable of finding it within you

Even though some days are hard

And others will not give you what you gave or continue to give without condition.

Yet that’s not their job

So, don’t expect it.

It’s yours.

You will find when you do receive it

It will be easier to accept the praise

That’s something we find hard – to accept praise.

And it shouldn’t be.

If you are OK from within

Praise will feel so much more genuine because you won’t question it

You wont question others

You wont feel anything beyond thankful

And in that non-expectant space you will smile

Happiness

An inside job.

Yours.

True

Inner

Bliss

xx

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And yes…I should have known better…

As I sit here with a semi blocked nose knowing full well its food related

I cant ignore it.

Inflammation back to rule my world within half hour at a guess

I knew better.

What exactly was I expecting?

Nothing different 😦

I didn’t order pizza myself, yet couldn’t resist that amazing pepperoni slice.

I can still taste it now

Ironically I can taste it but cant smell a thing.

Ughgh my skin is itchy and eyes are blurring up.

Itchy scalp.

Ah joy.

And will I do it again ?

Probably.

Yet what I am noticing is the reduction in frequency of my transgressions big time.

Because I remove most of the problems.

So I will play here uncomfortable for a bit.

Take a zyrtec and supplement with herbals knowing full well that the combination is da bomb.

What I also recognise is that I notice the symptoms so much more.

And it would be really easy to assume they are getting worse

Yet they truly aren’t

They are more noticeable because they are sooo not my normal anymore

I think its easy to fall into the trap of thinking I tolerate them more now,

Yet in reality, my system is no longer so overloaded as it struggled from crash to crunch to crash on a daily basis.

I am healthier and my body is more able to bounce back.

Not that it should have to, yet the reality is, it still has to.

Because pepperoni called and I answered.

My daughter asked me why I didnt want the donuts or icecream.

In my head I answered.

I have eaten 10 years too many sweets already so I have already eaten enough for today, tomorrow, next week and next decade.

Had it so am not missing it.

Yet sometimes off the wagon I slip if you want to think of it that way.

Off to sleep shortly and it will be interesting to consider my sleep pattern.

Oh the things I am noticing as I work through this amazing mind gut health minefield!

More to share about my journey in the New Year I promise xx

For now its home brewed booch, kraut, hydrate and fresh air before calling it a night before that dreaded midnight 🙂

I will go stand on the balcony and take in the clean crisp night air.

Sleep well

Fingers Crossed.

I should know better.

PS : The rebel donuts were never considered. That would have been harakiri for me!

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Toxic is still toxic but what are you doing about it ?

Theres always these pics that we share and all BOOYA because we see them and we GET them

And this one is no different

You know I love these and share them yet not as often as I used to for a number of reasons

Theres always someone that assumes it’s about them.

Thats just their shit, not mine, and I don’t need to apologise for it.

Its very easy to read things incorrectly as I know I have done myself – kind of like internal autocorrect – and we all loath autocorrect – not the same thing.

People like to assume theres some crap going on which kind of fuels or is fuelled by reason 1.

Sells a lot of popcorn.

Yet the thing that is important is what I ask my students and my kids – for the same reason yet from a different space…

So What are you going to do about it ?

Its all good and well to recognise toxicity – in fact its a gift when you DO as many do NOT

Yet what are you doing about it

For YOU.

You make a choice and you move onto the next thing.

This meme is cool and all however what does it actually MEAN?

It’s about being at peace with yourself in a shitstorm really.

Even a plumber starts his day clean (well mostly).

What he chooses to do with a sewer doesn’t have to come home with him?

In fact my guess is they attend, diagnose the problem as quick as possible

Fix that problem, wash up and leave.

So I guess take the plumber option and unless its your job – don’t attend the scene.

Maybe thats half of reason 1.

People who think it’s about them are hypersensitive. Thats not going to be your issue if you mind your own space.

As spirit always say to me ‘Pay no Mind my dear’.

Good advice.

So dont engage

Its not about winning and losing the GAME

Thats an energy nightmare with a Karma bus parked waiting for instructions.

Its about not losing your energy where its isn’t going to bring the best result for anyone

So the win is the fact you retain your own energy for your own healing.

now THATS WINNING

SO its a cool meme yet for so many reasons that many wont contemplate

And I wish they would.

Peaceful Life starts with a peaceful choice in the right moment

 

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