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What I learned from letting people help me

Some of us are determined to do everything that we are capable of.

Now I want you to read that line carefully.

The word Capable is the KEY

We are incredibly capable

All of us in our own way.

And that can be a double edged sword…in SO many ways.

I am gifted in being incredibly capable

Thats not me being full of myself

Thats me realising I have been gifted with great faculties both physical and mental, and I can pretty much turn my hand to anything – and have.

It comes from an abundance mindset, and encouragement

However.

As I have said many many times……

I have the capabilities to do almost any job – doesn’t mean I should.

That is NOT a judgement – that is why I say – I am lucky – gifted – that I see myself as capable, and see other choices available where others may not.

What I am suggesting is this.

Many of us have to get to what we feel is rock bottom.

We keep on going and keep on going – because we can.

We physically or mentally – or both – keep going because we are capable of doing so.

You choose whether to wait for armageddon or jump off the merry go round now.

So comes the sting into the tail.

Many of us (me included) know or have known that martyr in us

We do it all – because we can.

However

We don’t always have to.

I was told years ago that I needed to let others help me.

I was told I would learn a great deal about myself if I did.

And so I did.

I decided to accept assistance

And it was easy to do

Not abdicating my responsibility

And the offers were abundant.

Abundant.

As abundant as the offers I always made

Coming with the same ‘no strings attached’.

It was wonderful. Is wonderful.

I ‘let’ others help me – just as I had always been the one to say ‘I will do it – I will help you’.

And others always accepted my help.

(I think in hindsight it is also because I sounded so confident when I offered it

I knew I would do my best, and that is all people really ask for right ?)

So I, in reality, returned the compliment.

And this is what I learned… also about myself.

 

If you let people help you, you see the joy they gain from a job well done.

If you let people show their capabilities, you will find they do things differently to you

And it looks different.

And its capable too.

It enables them the feeling of capability that I loved too.

It didn’t say ‘I can’t do something’ by letting others do something I can do myself.

(Now THATS a big one if you like to prove yourself a lot….)

Its Sharing the love.

The other thing it did

Was make me see how easy it is to judge others.

When we do everything ourselves, it is easy to point the finger at those who are not doing things

It is easy to assume laziness

It is easy to assume lots of things

It is easy to assume someone is taking advantage – when they are actually accepting your help

It is easy to make judgement calls

Are you really trying to point out how capable you are by doing..when others are not doing ?

Now thats another Big question….

Sometimes…we get into our own heads

Up our own kybers…

And behave like they accepted our help because, well, they can’t do it as well as we can

Figure they maybe accepted our help because they KNOW we could do a better job then they do

It is almost impossible to see balance.

And easy to get sucked into.

You can’t see balance if you are always doing for others and not letting them do for you.

If you do not let others help you

It is easy to get caught up in the cleverness of you

Because you are being clever, capable, and helping everyone else with your cleverness

There is no doubting your capability

The fact is – there probably never was.

So I learned

If you don’t let others help you

You will likely be judgemental and clever – all on your own.

No balance in that

No joy in that

No fun in that

No laughter in that

No love in that.

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Said no dead person – Ever …..

It never ceases to amaze me

How much Bull:”{)( spews forth

Whilst everyone knows the truth.

Why perpetuate the lie

Just to keep the peace ?

And we aren’t talking about world events by the way.

Its nearly Xmas

And we know the games are played.

It is clearly going to be an interesting day.

Why ?

I asked spirit why can’t people just say what really goes on ?

The chuckle comes from within….

If you are too scared to tell someone the truth

Thats an ALARM BELL

A-LARM.

Now I have always found myself in hot water for being open

Ruining the Mystique so to speak.

Thats because it is bullshit people.

It is perpetuating the facade

And for what – exactly ?

Keeping the peace ?

Do you know what Peace actually is ?

Spirits answer to my Q ?

“I have no regrets that I didn’t say what I really wanted to say…said no dead person….Ever”

SO ask YOURself…

Do you really want to come and find me when you are dead and say what you really wanted to say to those still living ?

Welcome to the voices in my head…

Have a good one !

good person

Polish Proverb comes home to roost – How ironic…

I often wonder why I end up being drawn to a seemingly irrelevant post – only to find it answers a question about what or why someone is behaving in a certain way…

This speaks volumes about why some people appear to ‘not be able to help themselves’ when they see others happy.

They just can’t bear it and stay living their own lives.

They just don’t evolve.

More, they devolve as the ‘cutesy’ thing wheres off, the Tom Cruise smile and the ‘Posse’ all fade…..

I tried to explain to my daughter why some adults we knew just couldn’t seem to help themselves – they just had to make drama out of nothing

“The circus monkey behavior is equivalent to a wild animal needing to brutalize younger animals in a pack in order to establish dominance.”

Narcissistic behaviour in a nutshell…

The Proverb ?

Not my Circus

Not my Monkeys.

Thank you Spirit

liars

 

If you could actually make a change….

Many times I hear others – and to be honest – myself….

Wondering out loud –

If I could actually make a change to ‘x’ I know everything would be better for it.

Then I saw this….

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